O - Outcast

A very late O, but what the hell it want to finish this, late or not!
- My deadline is three days, the question is; can I make it?
In various  periods of my life I have been an outcast; a person without friends and I've perennially felt a little different from others. But there is nothing wrong about feeling that way.

Just because I have never been afraid to be myself and show it, it does not mean that I should feel different or weird. It's okay to be who you are and not change, for the shake of other unless you want to.

Recently I have undertaking a motto called "accept what you can't change,  change what you can't accept". Since I have begun living by those words things seem more simple and decisions about change, easier to make.

Though you can't decide whether you are an outcast or not, you can try changing it even though it's probably really hard. Try to approach some new people, some you maybe never would have thought about approaching otherwise. I know it's hard, when you are an outcast it's rarely by choice and often you are a shy person (I am), but trying is what matters. What matters even more is what you think about yourself, because people will come and go, in the end it's yourself you have to live with all of your life. I know that and now you know it too and hopefully that will help you.

Knowing that and that I have had those bad experience's in my life have made me stronger as a person..

Get lost

I want to write, I want to be gone, somewhere else. I don't want to die, I never wanted that. I wish to live, I always will. But i want disappear completely and become mindless. Lose my head in another persons life, because of some reason my life isn't good enough, even though I have all I could wish for.  Sometimes it's just not enough. Of course there are some material things I want, but they aren't necessary for a good life.

It's weird that, when I'm done with the days deed, school, grocery, cooking and my homework, all I want to do is become someone else or at least get lost in a story/movie.

I wonder if anyone else have ever felt this way. Always the thought, am I the only one to think this? Am I truly alone?

For me it is just two of they many questions and thoughts I have.

But what I think most of, is the life I want to live. All the dreams I have. So many that I can't even remember them all. When the day comes and my dreams come true, maybe I don't want to escape my own life any more or get lost in another's. Or some fiction.  Because my life will be good enough.

I hope so. I dream of that.