P - Parkinson's disease

I thought about writing about party's, procrastination or Paris, but I ended up wanting to write about Parkinson's disease. It's a disease close to my own heart and family. I decided to write about this, to make people aware that this is an actual disease and not just something old people gets, because the are getting old and it's nothing to joke about. 

My father has Parkinson's disease, he was diagnosed in 2009 when I was away on boarding school.

Year by year the disease has been getting worse on my dad. First, before he was diagnosed it was just a little shaking in his left hand now three years later he can't sleep though a night, both his hands shake, his legs are cramping the hole time. The time he is well is when he is running, walking or riding his bicycle.

He didn't have it this way three years ago. Maybe he would be a lot better right now, if me and my mom didn't pressured him to go to the doctor back then.

He is not even a bad case, he's are a mild case, at least for now.

All those thoughts about, "maybe it's the pills he have to take" or "the doctor" who doesn't know shit about Parkinson and doesn't want to refer to a specialist.

Maybe he would be better of without the pills.

Being away on boarding school made it all easier for me of course I struggled with my thoughts, but as time has gone and I came home, I could see with my own eyes what this disease do to a person.

Have you ever had a close family member suffering from a chronic disease?
Share your experiences:)

Don't know

Have you ever felt, that you doubted yourself?

Lately I have. I'm beginning to think that I'm taking the wrong education. That it's not my match. There is so many homework to read and papers to be written . I'm just not that person. I can't get myself together and use 5-7 hours of my life, just because I have a paper due. I have better things to to, more fun things. Things that I might care more about, than just schoolwork. Sure I like to go there and learn new stuff. I love learning new technical terms and being able not only to understand them, but use them in a sentence. It makes me feel intelligent. I mean who doesn't like to feel intelligent?

If I was rich, I could do anything I wanted. Instead of doing things, because I have to. I HAVE to take an education, that will be able to give me an income in the future.

Why can't I be the main character, from the movie "About a Boy"? He was rich and happy. Didn't need to do a thing. The downside of his life, is that he hadn't any friends at all.

If I had to choose between money and friends, friends would always be my choice. Because I know from past experience that without them, I would feel like shit.

That is why i probably will continue with this education, because how would I be able to keep contact with my current friends?

I don't know. Sometimes you simply just don't know.